I started a new book today, (thanks to Rachel for the suggestion!) and I've only gotten a few pages in and realized I probably can't read this on my lunch breaks unless I want everyone to see me weep like a little girl.
In the opening chapters alone she honestly lays out what a lot of us are scared to admit even to ourselves, or at least I know for a fact I do. In the midst of incalculable loss,we can begin to question whether God is truly good, whether he really has our best interests at heart. With all the terrible slayings happening this past year, it's definitely something that sneaks into our mourning hearts. In our heads we know the answer, the one that most of us have grown up hearing in church pews. But it's our hearts that bleed and cry out...why. And how do we respond to that? Like her, I "hunger for filling in a world that is starved'. And I wonder how, in the midst of often mediocre, day to day living, to "live fully so I will be fully ready to die". Sometimes these things aren't even in my conscience, and yet I know deep down I worry over them.
Now that I have to get back to work, teary-eyed and all, I am anxious to discover what she discovers about God's unending grace and love and perfect plan for his people. Keep you posted. And if anyone wants to start a book club, get at me, bro.
Dare to live an emptier, fuller life.
